Kindness does not require a retweet

Kindness is defined as “the quality of being friendly, generous and considerate”. Kindness is a quality I would hope all of us would possess, however, looking at the state of the world and the society we live in I often doubt that.  Recent events in the United Kingdom have created a surge of “kindness”, I have read numerous quotes posted on social media about being kind to others. My social medias have also been filled with posts describing “random acts of kindness” that people have participated in. I love random acts of kindness; I have participated in the 12 days of Christmas kindness for as long as I can remember. Random acts of kindness, when done correctly, are beautiful. One simple act can change an individual’s day, week, month or even life. The issue is being kind is becoming some sort of “trend”. Being kind to others has become an extraordinary event in people's lives that needs to be documented and posted all over social media. I have seen so many posts this past week of people helping the elderly with tasks, buying the homeless a meal, donating clothes or toys to charity shops and numerous other acts of “good works”. While it’s fantastic that these acts of kindness are being carried out, it makes me question the sincerity behind them. There is no doubt that toys and clothes donated to a charity shop will help and benefit others and the homeless will benefit from a good meal, but what do they benefit from the social media posts? People say it is to “inspire others” to carry out acts of kindness but I don’t think that it true. Taking photos of your “kindness” and posting it to social media is not an act carried out to benefit the recipient of the kind act but rather to benefit the poster, to encourage praise and provide a sense of validation. The worst thing is these posts receive praise because helping others when there is nothing in it for ourselves has become unheard of in modern society. The term I'll scratch your back if you scratch mine has never been more accurate. Our lives have become so consumed by social media and the need for validation from others that the warm, fuzzy feeling being kind provides or gratitude shown by others is not enough of a reward. You can’t post a feeling on facebook afterall.  

Social media is a platform on which we can be more sociable, reach out to more people and could, if used correctly, be a tool that supports great kindness, a sense of community and a safety net for those that need it the most. Instead of making us kind, social media has made us selfish. Selfish to the point where we take advantage of other people’s kindness, including the kindness of our friends. We make unnecessary comments and belittle others just to get a few likes, to give us a few seconds of self-validation. We use social media platforms as a way of communicating with our friends, yet we often forget that there is an actual person at the end of that message. We are so busy posting “inspiring” quotes on social media and trying to think of an act of kindness that will get us the most likes that we are failing to see the struggles those closest to us are facing. While we are trying to find the poorest looking person in Asda so we can pay for their shopping, we are ignoring the friend that just needs a cup of tea and someone to talk to. We are too busy trying to play the “hero”. Too busy telling everyone our own problems to notice the difficulties others are facing. We are so stuck in our own heads, putting our own needs, including the need for praise and validation, before the needs of others. We are failing at being kind. Kindness is not about likes, retweets or followers, it is about helping another being because it is the decent and most normal thing to do.  

Everyone has problems, social media is most definitely one of them.